I love my God & every challenge He brings before me. I am so incredibly undeserving & He is so unbelievably faithful.
I think when people say too much of something is never a good thing, they tend to sort of categorize those “too much” things. I think ample amounts of some things are always needed, especially some of the things I’ve had a lot of lately. A lot of guidance. A lot of care. A lot of love. A lot of gentleness. A lot of running. A lot of to-do lists. A lot of uplifting conversation. A lot of love from my Heavenly Father. A lot of patience. A lot of prayer. Definitely a lot of prayer. And while “a lot” may seem bland to you, it holds significance to me. There was a moment in the past week when a dear friend and I were ranting on and on about something, and she yelled, “A LOT!” at the top of her lungs. So now, when things get difficult or we’re feeling particularly stressed and overwhelmed and frazzled and confused, we just shout those two words at the top of our lungs in the middle of parking lots, out Jeep windows, and in dorm rooms. Sometimes we just feel “a lot” or too much at once. And that’s perfectly okay because it’s a sign from God that we are still alive and we are still capable of feeling. Hopefully that makes you look at pain & frustration in a new way.
This weekend has been one for the books (especially because it was 3 days of good weekend vibes). From hiking to girls’ movie night to dancing to coffee dates to being productive to bike rides to unwinding, everything about it was absolutely perfect. I’m just so happy, and I know that’s overused and cliché and yadda yadda yadda, but hear me when I say this: Every time I don’t think I could ever feel happier, God’s like, Hahaha I will prove you wrong again, Jenna! And I am loving every minute of that. I am so unbelievably happy. I always step back and think, “Wow. God really does have my best interests in mind. I can’t believe I am where I am, standing on the most beautiful campus in world watching His masterpiece unfold.” All of these beautiful things and He still calls me child, daughter, worthy, lovable. He loves me so much that it makes my heart want to beat out of my chest and I can feel tears brimming on my eye lashes. His love is overwhelming, really. Wow. It’s really mind-blowing if you think about it too hard and for too long.
With all of this being said and to whomever is reading this, I hope you have a truly amazing week & that you feel nothing but gratefulness. Grateful for the frazzled feelings, the butterflies in your stomach, the happiness from the simple things, the pain that will challenge you, and whatever other feeling is pressing into your heart. Remember that you are lovable & worthy of love from the King of the Universe. God wants your heart. He desires time with you, and He wants you to confide in Him. Lean into Him today & He will lean into you. Walk with the reassurance that you are never alone. He is always faithful. No matter how many times we run in the opposite direction or sin or go against what He wants for us, if we come running back, He is there. Just like the prodigal son.
“I will arise and go to my father, and I will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Treat me as one of your hired servants.”’ And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ But the father said to his servants, ‘Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate. For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.’ And they began to celebrate.” – Luke 15:18-24 ESV
“If we are faithless, He remains faithful.”
– 2 Timothy 2:13 ESV
And last thing! I found something on a friend’s blog that I thought was pretty nifty, so I’m going to try it out!
Currently I’m… #1
Loving: Journaling. I am obsessed. All of my thoughts just kind of stream out & I’m able to put my stresses and desires and distractions onto paper, and I let them go in the process. It’s incredibly freeing.
Learning: How to handle stress. It doesn’t come easily, but like I said, I’m still learning. This also fuels a newfound love for running. I love running. The other night I did 5.13 miles and I don’t think I’ve ever felt so great after a run and so excited about my muscles being sore. This is the greatest stress reliever I have found to date.
Reading: I am reading (still) One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp & I am also reading a lot out of Ephesians and Romans.
Eating: So much salad. The salad bar in our dining hall is fantastic & I love it. Salad, shredded carrots, black olives, hard-boiled eggs, sunflower seeds, grilled chicken, etc. It’s incredible.
Excited about: All of the unexpected challenges I am being faced with. That sounds so weird, usually people freak out at those things. I’m starting to learn how to get excited about them because I know my God has equipped me to deal with them. I’m resting in that a lot lately.
Needing: More than 24 hours in a day & impeccable memory to recall and write down all of these amazing memories and moments I’m living out & a back massage does sound nice.
Thinking about: Everything I have to get done tomorrow, and how grateful I am for where God has me. I live in a castle and get to watch the sunset over a field filled with deer every night. I’m not sure it gets much better than that from where I’m standing. I can’t stop thinking about how fortunate and mind-blown I am by where the Lord has picked me up and set me apart.
Thankful for: Everything. Being able to feel, love, and comprehend. I love to feel this overwhelming love & sense of comfort in an uncomfortable, new setting and season of life. However, I am especially thankful for Jesus’ never-ending love letter to me & coffee.